The Crazy Zone, Part 2

The second thing I've been doing during this particular Crazy Zone is follow-through, both on work projects but also and especially household chores. Rather than leave laundry in the dryer for days or piling dirty dishes in the sink because I can't be bothered to empty the dishwasher, I start and finish the task at hand.

This reduces my stress in many ways:

1. I don't have a million little tasks using up brain space.
2. My environment is visually calm.
3. I show my love for my husband, who is stressed by a dirty and messy house. 
4. It gives me perspective on how busy I think I am.
5. It encourages mindfulness.

Of course follow-through is not always possible. My handy dandy schedule lets me know when I can take a few minutes to finish the job and when time is simply too tight.

Another technique I use when I don't have time to finish a task is splitting it up into smaller steps: I start and finish one guilt-free, knowing the next bit comes later.

* * *

I recently did this when taking on a big task which was important to my heart but had nothing to do with work. My next-door neighbor, who is 92, was fretting because her side garden hadn't received topsoil in over 15 years and was generally looking a little shaggy. She cannot see this side garden from her home unless she opens a window and looks down, but I have a lovely view of it from my dining room. So of course I offered to take on the job - even though I knew time was tight.

Over the course of a few weeks, I pruned the plants, turned the soil, ordered compost delivery, spread the compost, turned the soil again, and took two trips to the hardware store to buy supplies so I could install soaker hoses.

Doing this project made me feel honored; I got to help my sweet elderly neighbor, and work a garden that's been on this planet twice as long as I have. It kept my perspective on the important things in life. It was fun, and gave me a much-needed break from deadlines. 

* * *

There is so much we can't control in life, but a little bit of follow-through shows us how much power we do have in creating a life that we love.

Round-up: The Autonomic Nervous System

Got two minutes? This video is about the Rest and Digest function of our nervous system and how you can use it to help heal chronic pelvic pain.

The Crazy Zone, Part 1

Last week we talked about the importance of Rest and Digest. But how do you manage that when life inevitably gets a little crazy?

This August, September and October have been nutty for me. I am more productive when I have a sense of rhythm and routine in my life, but rhythm and routine were nowhere to be found.

The first step for me was noticing. Yes. Seeing that I was in a crazy zone, and would be for some time, was incredibly helpful. I didn't realize this until the beginning of September, and my first reaction was a bit of panic - Gah! How am I going to survive two more months of this?? - but then I realized that it came with a bright side: November would be a bring a bit of calm and flexibility. Phew.

I puttered along with this newfound realization in my head - a good start - but the lack of routine was throwing me off and making it harder to get through the day and week. What to do? The next step was some serious looking ahead.

I sat down with my calendar, and rather than looking a week ahead as I normally do, looked at September, October and November. I anticipated the time I would need to prepare and execute each project, and blocked off time before the deadlines. I realized that getting certain projects done during this time was unrealistic, and pushed them to November, thereby relieving myself of the cloud of guilt that was hovering over my lack of progress.

I then scheduled in exercise and yoga, my personal favorites for keeping balance in my life. Since I know those times are limited, I am less likely to skip them.

I realized that my usual goal to keep Sundays free for relaxing would not happen for most of October, so the one day I do have will be held absolutely sacred - no way will I let that dissolve into "just a few" errands and get togethers. I then set aside each Sunday in November as a Lazy Day, so I would get to fill up on quiet time before the craziness of the holidays.

I'll keep writing about The Crazy Zone this week, but for now here are a few tips on dealing with unusual periods of high stress or activity:

1. Notice you are in The Crazy Zone.
2. Look ahead. How long will you be here?
3. Schedule, setting aside time in advance for each project.
4. Schedule in quiet and exercise dates. When you know they are coming, it will help you get through crunch time.

The Autonomic Nervous System Part 3: Maintaining Balance

Thus Far

In the first two parts of this series, you've looked at the Fight, Flight or Freeze and Rest and Digest responses in your body.

Both are important. Fight, Flight or Freeze keeps you alive in dangerous situations, and gives you energy when you exercise (the so-called "runner's high" comes from an adrenaline rush.) Rest and Digest allow you to do the work of thriving: growth and repair.

One or the Other

You can't use the sympathetic and parasympathetic nervous systems at the same time. Your body has to choose between the two. What this means is that if your body is in Fight, Flight or Freeze more often than necessary, you lose out on your ability to Rest and Digest. 

Stress in Present-Day America

Remember how in Part 1 you learned that many modern day stresses are interpreted by your body as threats, and it reacts by turning on Fight, Flight or Freeze? So...chances are you are in Fight, Flight, or Freeze more often than necessary, and losing out on your time to Rest and Digest. 

Not having time to Rest and Digest makes healing harder.

Oy vey. Chances are you can't get rid of traffic jams, your screaming kid, or your moody boss. So what CAN you do to turn on Rest and Digest? Plenty.

Rest and Digest's Secret Weapon

Fight, Flight or Freeze is mediated by your spinal cord (thoracic and lumbar regions, if you are curious) - the signal "THREAT!" only has to make it to your spine for your body to turn on Fight, Flight or Freeze. Your brain is not part of the equation. This allows for the quickest response during an emergency.

BUT

Rest and Digest is mediated by your sacral spinal cord AND your brain. That last detail is *super important.* It means that you can use your brain - your willpower - to turn on Rest and Digest when you want to.

Cool.

Training Time 

You can train your body to override Fight, Flight or Freeze if your brain realizes that the situation does not require it. For instance, you can teach yourself how to be calm during gridlock, while watching your kid meltdown, or dealing with another one of your boss's unreasonable demands. Are those situations stressful? Sure. But do they have to be? Not necessarily.

Do not pretend to be calm - while on the inside you are a mess - but  call on your training so you can really be calm, inside and out, when a difficult situation arises. You probably have heard of this before - it's stress management.

Switching between the Two

The key to finding balance - the unique balance that works for you at this stage in your life - is that

You want your body to be able to switch quickly and efficiently between Fight, Flight or Freeze and Rest and Digest.

Don't be discouraged if you go to a yoga class or get a massage and then walk out and almost get hit by a car. Yes, you are no longer in Rest and Digest - but the fact that you can react quickly to a threat is a sign that your nervous system is working properly. Once the threat has passed, you want to go back to Rest and Digest efficiently. That is why taking yoga, getting massages, or doing meditation are so helpful - they train our body in Rest and Digest, so that over time, we are able to switch into it more quickly.

The Take-away

Figure out what activities gets you to a state of Rest and Digest, and put them at the top of your priority list. Rest and Digest is not a luxury, it's a necessity.

To get there, you may use one of the techniques listed above, or something else, maybe a particularly enjoyable hobby: gardening, playing your favorite instrument, woodworking. 

How do you know you are in Rest and Digest? One simple sign is that your belly begins to gurgle. That is the "Digest" part in action.

By encouraging Rest and Digest, not only will you feel better in the moment, it will train your body to spend more time there, giving you additional resources to heal your pain.

And healing your pain is exactly what you want to do.

 

The Autonomic Nervous System Part 2: Rest & Digest

The Parasympathetic Nervous System

The Parasympathetic Nervous System, often referred to as the Rest and Digest response, takes over when there are no threats present. When you don't need to fight, run, or freeze, your body can go back to chillin' out and taking care of itself.

Your blood and energy return to your digestion, your heart rate maintains its normal (non-emergency) rate, your adrenal glands stop releasing adrenaline, your pupils stop dilating, and the muscles that contract to make your hair stand on end relax.

This is the place you want your body to be when you are not facing an immediate threat or emergency.

In this state you get to put your resources towards thriving instead of surviving: your body performs maintenance and upkeep, aka healing.

The Importance of "Rest and Digest"

You can see how essential the parasympathetic nervous system is to your overall health. Without it, you wouldn't be able to efficiently process nutrients, sleep, enjoy a day on the beach, read a book, give a hug - any activity that requires you to be calm.

If you were always in Fight, Flight or Freeze your heart would wear out, your digestive system wouldn't have enough energy to do its work, your eyes would constantly be on alert.

It would be very hard to fall asleep, do focused work in a sustainable manner, or go about your daily life. Which probably sounds an awful lot like you, since you are dealing with chronic pelvic pain.

So Now What?

In the next post you'll learn about how to keep your nervous system in balance, so you have your Fight, Flight or Freeze response primed to go when you need it, and can spend the rest of the time happily Restin' and Digestin'.